Vikings vs Clowns

May 21, 2018

So, I went to the Viking parade in Poulsbo, Washington this weekend. I lived in the area until the age of ten, and the Viking parade was no doubt one of the highlights of every year. It's pretty much were my obsession with vikings and pirates come from. What struck me as soon as the procession started was this... the viking parade is the inspiration for the Harvest Festival parade in my book, Clown Apocalypse. Replace vikings with clowns and bam! You've got total anarchy. The similarities were undeniable. I was so stricken that I had to write about it. I include photos. This does not follow the parade progression, just me typing randomly. Hope you enjoy.

 

Vikings!

Right off the bat. This woman scared me. She saw me snap her picture, and started walking towards me. I texted Erin Fitch this pic and she told me to scream Axe Murderers Unite! since the viking has that wicked axe tied to her waist. I texted Erin that by the look this Viking Warrioress gave me as she passed by, I was closer to peeing my pants. If I go missing after posting this post, YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENED.  Then there's this amazing hunk of scary viking-ness!

And then this happened...  all the vikings come over and ARRRR! Sometimes in your face. It isn't quite the vikings hopping over ships and snatching women and kids and running off that happened in my childhood, but it's still fun.

 

 

Then, we have the the Night Devils. Poulsbo/Silverton/Bremerton area has a large population of Harley bikers. My late grandmother on my bio father's side was a biker, and she had biker boyfriends. They took me on rides. I love bikers, especially the dangerous, scary kind. ;-) When I saw this gang of harley riders with viking helmets buzzing through the parade--yeah, def inspiration for the Night Devils. 

 

 

 

What is this guy riding on? I have no idea. But it looks cool!

 

 

Not only did I see the Night Devils, but I saw Chloe herself. Okay, so this woman is white, older, and i have no idea what Sheriff for a day is, but still the reference startled me. There are no coincidences.

 

 

Remember the scene in Clown Apocalypse when the police chief is riding in a limousine through the crowd? He's standing through the roof with heavy jewelry around his neck, waving his arms with the crowd while Damn It Feels Good to be a Gangster blasted from the speakers... this reminded me of that. Except it was with the SWAT team and hummer.  Fun fact: In the first few drafts of the story I called him Chief Asshole. Seriously. It wasn't until the final draft I realized I actually had to give the chief a real name. But all I could think of was Chief Asshole since that is what I'd been calling him all that time. In the end, I settled on Chief Ascot. It was the closest to Ass I could think of. Btw- how did you like the way Chief Ascot's story ended? I was pretty proud of myself on that. *Salutes*

 

 

I saw Super G's grocery girls, minus the old woman showing off her garters—thank fu..ruitcake. 

 

There was no shortages of Oodles of Doodles. There were several doggies in the parade.

And there was a white pony in a viking hat. You're welcome. You may now die.

And there were so many people. This girl was climbing up the telephone booth. Yes, my darlings, telephone booths still exist.

 

 

 

And it was LOUD! Several children wore earmuffs. 

 

 Yes, I totally memed this awesome viking woman. Please, do not murder me while I sleep. Or while I'm awake for that matter.

 

 

There were these awesome kids on unicycles and somehow jogging on these balls. Clown enough for me!

 

And I spotted a Viking Spider Woman. Why does she exist? I have no idea. Stop asking questions, get down on your knees and thank the gods that a Viking Spider Woman exists.

 

There were no shortages of viking ships...

 And there were pirates, naturally. Yo ho ho!

 

 

And odd things... 'Why is dirt odd?' you may ask. Because it has a ribbon around it and toted as organic. Organic dirt. No shit, Sherlock. Ding ding—prize! You win a ribbon. And a howling pig. And a purple thing getting jiggy with it. And a giant human bobbly British Judge head!?!

 

There was dancing...

 

 There was love...

 

There was me..

 

 There was mini-me... who takes much better selfies than I do...

 

 

The End.

 

<3

 

Mav

 

ps If you haven't read Clown Apocalypse— what the devil are you waiting for? Click on the book cover below. 

 

 

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